We live in a world of critics + doubters.
Have you ever had someone doubt that you could do something?
Of course you have! This is normal. And I am here to tell you a little secret if you’re sick of this. You’re probably pretty sick of it. People can be mean and they can be quite negative. So, I will let you in on a little secret if you are tormenting yourself over the negative words sent your way from others.
It’s because you’re incredible. It’s because you’re different.
I am not saying this because I am a fluffy happy, rainbow princess. Although – I kind of am a fluffy, happy rainbow princess. I am saying it because it’s true.
Have you ever noticed that when you follow the status quo – life is easy! Life is good. No one is questioning you, because you’re being the way you are supposed to be. You are being normal. And by being normal you’re assuring that we are all very comfortable. You’re staying in school, applying for corporate jobs, and you might even start #adulting and “make a wise investment” in the most rapidly depreciating purchase possible – you buy a car!
In retrospect – have you ever noticed that when you step outside the box of normalcy, the doubt of your peers is heavily vocalized?
Perhaps you drop out of school to pursue a business. Friends tell you that you can’t. That some people can – but not you.
Perhaps you choose to be a free-lance photographer. Friends tell you that you will fail. That some people can make a living that way – but not you.
Perhaps you decide to further your schooling for six more years. Friends tell you that you’re wasting your money. That some people can make that worth it – but not you.
These people (who may be some of your best friends) are not bad people. There isn’t anything wrong with going with the flow. You do not need to scorn them and cut them out of your lives. That’s silly. The worst thing you can do is allow their words of doubt to convince you that it’s true. That you can’t do it.
Someone who voices their doubt in regard to your dreams and aspirations, just doesn’t think like you think. They are good, you are good. They just don’t get it. The potential freedom that you could have because of your tenacity, scares them. We are human, sometimes we get jealous. And sometimes that jealousy turns into something a little more aggressive. You could have something that they do not, and that can create friction.
TIPS TO KEEP ON GOING
- Encourage your doubters – encourage them to follow a dream they have. Nothing is better than working on something new and different with a friend. You have been there for each other through plenty. This is something you can do together, as well. Rebuttal their doubts and criticisms with “what is your dream?” Everyone has one.
- Focus on the “what if it does work?” – so many people will ask you the question “well, what if you fail?” and it is almost impossible to get the question erased once it is asked. But it is your job to control your mind enough and, instead, think about what will happen when you do succeed.
- Remind yourself of the accomplishments so far – many people will point out that you’re moving slow, others are passing you, that your progress is unimpressive to them. Where did you start? Are you any further than where you started? Remind yourself that you have come a long way. And, although, you might have a long way to go, you have what it takes.
- Don’t become a doubter when you face failure – those are the most fake people of all time. If you’re a dreamer, you better be everyone’s biggest fan. And I mean everyone. Just because you’re having a bad day doesn’t mean that you get to make fun of people like American Idol’s famously terrible William Hung (he still sold approx. 200,000 records + is buddies with Paula and Randy. Happy Endings can happen to anyone). Catch yourself and stop being an asshole. You want people to support you? Then support other people. This is never just about you. Be nice even when things suck.
People will doubt you. People will critique you. It is not your job to tell them how great you are. It is your job, however, to put your head down, get to work, and show them. Support others. Never by cynical. And for goodness sake, believe in yourself. Because so many people will not when you begin.
Love others + love yourself